Chairman MacFarquhar! Chairman MacFarquhar!
I apologize for this breathless interruption. I am informed that Disaster Movie has managed to live up to its name. It just scored an amazing 0% on www.rottentomatoes.com's tomatometer, potentially making it the worst movie ever.
This is one rating that I would prefer to not vet by testing.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Sunday, September 7, 2008
... more debates on old and new
Thank you, Chairman MacFarquhar. It has indeed been some time since we last convened this august gathering. Your views on the slightly dated matters brought before this congress were insightful.
One point of dissent. While the orbiculur state of people in the future imagined in Wall-E is not unlike the many who have achieved similarly well covered state, my point was that it is unlikely that given the technology everyone would opt for such a state. The sex drive would ensure that a sizable number would opt for the exact opposite. Having said that, the simplification is no more eggregious than the portrayal of alien worlds as nothing more than glorified towns. Considering the diversity in human civilizations on earth, that portrayal is no more realistic than the plumpness portrayed in Wall-E.
On Watchmen: It is with great sadness that I contemplate the making of 'Watchmen'. What will they make of it? Nothing good, I expect.
The good news is that I had a similar sense of foreboding before the Lord of the Rings. LOFR is a sweeping epic that frankly was so grand that I was convinced that a movie would only be a depressing let down. At first glance, my fears seemed well-founded. The movies make substantial omissions and didn't do justice to characters such as the Ents. On the other hand, the story was retold with spectacular panache, retaining much that was exciting about the books. So, I have been surprised before.
But can we expect the same of a Hollywood blockbuster attempt? I doubt it. The brooding realism of Dark Knight, bore more similarity to James Bond than Batman. And, 'V for Vendetta' was a dismal compared to the comics.
I have such low expectations, that the movie will probably surprise me.
What is your view, Chairman MacFarquhar?
One point of dissent. While the orbiculur state of people in the future imagined in Wall-E is not unlike the many who have achieved similarly well covered state, my point was that it is unlikely that given the technology everyone would opt for such a state. The sex drive would ensure that a sizable number would opt for the exact opposite. Having said that, the simplification is no more eggregious than the portrayal of alien worlds as nothing more than glorified towns. Considering the diversity in human civilizations on earth, that portrayal is no more realistic than the plumpness portrayed in Wall-E.
On Watchmen: It is with great sadness that I contemplate the making of 'Watchmen'. What will they make of it? Nothing good, I expect.
The good news is that I had a similar sense of foreboding before the Lord of the Rings. LOFR is a sweeping epic that frankly was so grand that I was convinced that a movie would only be a depressing let down. At first glance, my fears seemed well-founded. The movies make substantial omissions and didn't do justice to characters such as the Ents. On the other hand, the story was retold with spectacular panache, retaining much that was exciting about the books. So, I have been surprised before.
But can we expect the same of a Hollywood blockbuster attempt? I doubt it. The brooding realism of Dark Knight, bore more similarity to James Bond than Batman. And, 'V for Vendetta' was a dismal compared to the comics.
I have such low expectations, that the movie will probably surprise me.
What is your view, Chairman MacFarquhar?
Saturday, September 6, 2008
Reconvention of the Flophouse Congress
Gentlemen,
I must offer my apologies for this extended absence. I can only say that we all know what the pressures and demands are of this season, and this year. Convention requires that convention be effected. And now that the convention season has come to an end, it is a pleasure to see this august body reconvened in this venue of convenience.
Sorry, I must pause to make use of the conveniences.
...
...
...
There. Let us congress. Well, now, as chairman I would like to make liberty of my privilege to escape from the strictures of the agenda.
If I may, then, without objection, assay to address some old business.
Evil Genius Dr. Domino (Our August Comptroller) has, of late brought to the table some commentary that has unfortunately not been granted the attention it deserves.
The chair would like to acknowledge Evil Genius Dr. Domino (Our August Comptroller)'s stellar endeavours and offer some comments of his own.
On Wall-E --
Evil Genius Dr. Domino (Our August Comptroller)
"What I had ... trouble with, was one of the fundamental premises of the movie - that consumerism would lead to mindless sloth and obesity. ... [T]his view fails to recognize a key aspect of human nature - sexual desire."
The chair believes that Our August Comptroller might be confusing two different things, namely, one the one hand the superficial standards of beauty for any particular cultural moment, and on the other hand, the basic human drive to spawn. The former is basically a fantasy. There are sufficient examples of societies that have differing standards of beauty that still manage to perform sexually. We need not just look at contemporary America, where thousands upon thousands of pairs of obese humanoids freely rut away while their minds are ruled by images of Keira Knightly and Calista Flockheart.
Of course, the future of hippopotamoidism triumphant as pained by Wall-E might not be inevitable, it certainly isn't inconceivable, not anyway from the perspective of popular notions of beauty.
The chairman and his embonpoint pause to catch their breaths.
On Battlestar Galactica (1978) --
The Colonials were not quite the sole humanoids left alive. There were non-Colonial planets with human-like lifeforms. In the face of this, the horror of the remnants of humanity does ebb a bit, doesn't it?
On Mamma Mia! --
Our August Comptroller, has, by admitting to having voluntarily viewed this presentation, called into question his right to the appellation "Evil Genius." Evidence of true geniusness is awaited by the chairman.
On The Dark Knight --
The chairman must admit that throughout the presentation, his mind kept turning to the trailer of Watchmen that had been shown before the feature.
The chairman recognizes Our August Comptroller to address the issue of Watchmen. To be noted is the question — Is it at all possible that this will be the single motion picture adaptation of an Alan Moore work that will not disappoint?
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